Hey all, this is a journal I started where I specifically talk about technology and my ongoing relationship with it.
I first had the idea of starting this journal after nobody viewed my little question about Microsoft edge. I soon realized that it would be a lot harder than just deleting a program and installing another one then I’m all good.
For a little background. I am a 17 year old senior student in high school. I love writing and reading comics and my main goal with no surf right now is finding the best software I can use to convert my writings on paper to text and bring my characters and ideas to life. With minimal distractions and just being able to focus without all the bullshit.
So yeah. I’m also probably going to close my previous two journals. I’m not sure what else I should say on them. I think it’s better if I mainly talk about technology on this website, since that’s what this site is mainly about.
My friend and I have been both having trouble “getting out there” so to speak. We both often feel alone. Even to each other because I live in America and he lives in Canada.
He’s probably using all those big social media apps right now to talk to his classmates. I myself have been waiting until I’m 18 to use Tinder because it’s made to where you have to meet people in real life.
Both of us have a pretty good reason for doing these things. We want to make friends, I myself want to date and get a girlfriend.
I’ll be honest with you all, I’ve had enough of high school. All the pointless drama, cliques, that damn bell, asking to use the bathroom, all that bullshit.
In about two weeks my schedule will undergo a massive change. Instead of having 7 classes, I’ll only have 2. I can come to school an hour earlier, and as you all know, I get to leave much earlier as well.
My question is, do these a apps work? Has anyone here actually used Tinder or any social media apps in an effort to make friends? Does it work? How would you do it?
That sounds nice about the schedule change, sounds like you’ll have more time.
I’ve used OkCupid, went on one date, but didn’t have much luck otherwise. I’ve never used tinder. It felt like OkCupid operated under similar addiction patterns as other social media sites, and I felt myself using it more compulsively. Notifications, novelty, ect. So, I’m less inclined to use it now, but I think it could work for some, it’s just not a guarantee.
I have had luck with Meetup.com. There’s a lot of different groups of people willing to actually meet in person. Plus you’re meeting on the basis of shared interests and I think that helps a lot.
I’ve never used Tinder (didn’t want to link my facebook account), but a bunch of different apps (with a focus on Germany). I liked OkCupid the most, as a big part is about your character and conversations. For a while, it helped me train keeping a conversation going via text.
But I still don’t recommend downloading it, because at one point, the social media aspect took over:
If you are feeling lonely, a dating app is one of the worst things to touch. Suddenly you can text a bunch of hot girls without actually forming a connection before. You get to exchange witty messages and pick what conversations to keep going. Wrote the wrong thing? Just forget that convo and swipe for a new girl. The swiping pool is endless, so there is no real consequence to your behavior. Every swipe is a dopamine rush as you see another attractive person you might get to date.
Oh, and the worst part? If nothing happens, you still had a small connection and felt less lonely. But if everything works out, there is a real chance at meeting new people - with a slim possibility of having sex. This combination is dangerous.
Long story short: Dating Apps are a tool to meet new people. If you can control yourself, it can result in friendships or even a romantic partner. But because you wrote:
… I’d recommend putting the dating apps on hold. There are other (NoSurf friendly) ways of meeting new people.
Meetup is my first choice, and even though it is an app, it’s not really addictive: You only get the dopamine rush if you actually attend a meeting. But just typing my interest + city into google (and ignoring websites like Reddit) will usually yield some results. The rest is footwork: Get out of your home and talk to those people
Things have been going pretty well. I’ve been writing comic book scripts on my iPad and smartphone for a while, only being on the computer to fix mistakes that happen when converting one file type to another. It’s not perfect but much better than when I used Google Docs. For some reason I felt like I couldn’t get anything done. Now I’m nearly dishing out a full chapter every now and then most of the time. Which is a step above.
I think my best solution right now is to avoid going on the computer as much as I can. Only to maybe convert and save my files or gathering images so I have a good idea of what my characters look like.
But that’s all I’ve been doing this entire weekend. And it may sound great if that’s all I want to do, but I also want to do more. Learn how to sing, play guitar, drive a car, and start with pencil sketches of my characters.
All of these things are helpful and I enjoy them. I just want to find a way to write a schedule and somehow stick to it without having to 100% rely on technology. Maybe somehow using a bell, though one thing I hated about high school was how my life revolved around a bell, it always felt like a prison. Doesn’t help that prisons actually do that.
In about 4 months, my phone contract will expire and I will finally be able to switch to a flip phone.
But recently I’ve been thinking. Even if I could, do I want to? Would it be really worth it?
Because even though we all think smartphones can be bad, which you’re all not wrong. How could downgrading to a previous model without maps or flashlight, two essential tools that could help me get out of a really sticky, possibly life or death situation. I’m not stupid. How would that help my mental health.
Maybe I shouldn’t worry about what phone I use. Just delete the internet browser, along with any social media apps and games and you’re good. I pretty much use it for two things, communication and typing for my comic book. I pretty much keep the bare essentials.
And then for my iPad. The only real “addicting” thing I have is essentially YouTube. I use it for background music mostly. But I’ve browsed in the past and watched videos.